A Day In The Life Of A Cat

1am

Last night just after 1am, I was awoke to the sound of helicopters flying around outside. It was clear they were not just passing by since it sounded like they were landing on our roof! I looked over at Greg who was sound asleep. Nothing wakes this man up ~ this man can sleep thru anything. So I get up and go out to the kitchen to look out the window to the street. There are two helicopters with spot lights hovering above the canyon that is across the street from my house. After about 5 minutes, neighbors start coming out. They stood in the street in their ratty bathrobes looking to the sky asking, What are they looking for?". Then, about 10 minutes later, they left. Gone. Everyone shuffled back into their houses. I was closing the blinds when I heard a cell phone ring. It was coming from my patio!! It only rang for a few seconds, but I knew it came from my patio. Petrified, I didn't move right away. All I could think was, sometimes when I get up in the middle of the night to a get a drink of water, I find the back door unlocked. Usually it's locked, but now and then we go to bed and forget to lock it. I crept towards the door, and when I peeked around the kitchen cabinet, I saw.....skip past the J.Lo skank story to read what I saw.

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You know I couldn't go very long without saying something about Mrs. Skank-a-ramma. Oh, for those of you who don't know, that's Jennifer Lopez-Anthony's skank name. Before I say anything else, let me just remind you that it was January of this year when Ben and the skank called it quits. Now, 6 months later, she's deeply in love, glowing from her diamond ring (again), very happy, married, and....