A Day In The Life Of A Cat

A woman is killed, her boyfriend arrested

Story by Tony Manolatos

Against the advice of nearly everyone, Nicole Sinkule convinced a judge it was safe to let her abusive boyfriend back into her life. Four months later, she died from a blow to the skull with a hammer.

The boyfriend was arrested an hour after Sinkule's body was found in her Oceanside apartment. Eric Nathaniel Marum pleaded not guilty to first-degree murder three days after the Oct. 16 homicide.

Sinkule and Marum, both 25, had dated for a year and a half, and the relationship was stormy almost from the beginning.

Last summer, two protective court orders that prevented the couple from seeing one another were lifted by retired San Diego Superior Court Judge Susan P. Finlay, despite her misgivings.

"This could be a very dangerous time," Finlay predicted, according to a tape of the June 3 proceeding.

The night before Sinkule was killed, her mother had a feeling her daughter had run out of time.

"I kissed her on the cheek and told her, 'Goodbye, Nicole. The next time I see you will be in heaven,' " Claudia Sinkule said.

A lot of people tried to help Nicole Sinkule – her parents, her sister, her best friend, police, prosecutors, victim advocates. Ultimately, the young woman put her trust in Marum and his San Diego attorney, Robert Lee Grimes.

At the hearing to lift the stay-away orders, which are issued by a judge at sentencing and act as a restraining order, Grimes made a case for the couple's reunion by noting how well his client was rehabilitating.

Grimes represented Marum in all of his court cases involving Sinkule, which included spousal abuse, vandalism and methamphetamine charges.

Both Grimes and Marum declined to comment for this story.

"It's just a terrible tragedy," said Heidi Yepis, a paralegal for Grimes who cried as she spoke. "We're very upset – it's affected both of us because we've known both of them for a while."

Sinkule grew up in Palm Springs with her parents and older sister, Danetta, 27. After graduating from high school in 1998, Sinkule moved to San Clemente to live with her sister. By her 20th birthday, she was living alone in San Diego. A waitress, Sinkule took classes at San Diego Mesa College. She wanted to be a nutritionist.

Marum, a construction worker, graduated from UCLA in June 2002 with a psychology degree. His parents, Douglass and Georgia, live in Napa, where Marum grew up. His brother, Jonathan B. Marum, is a San Diego attorney with an inactive bar license. His uncle, Roger Marum, lives in Los Angeles.

"Family members have been advised by counsel to not respond to inquiries," Roger Marum wrote in an e-mail.

Public defender Daniel Segura is now representing Marum, who is being held without bond in the Vista jail pending a January hearing. Segura declined to discuss the case.

'I want to protect you'

At the June hearing before Judge Finlay, Grimes told the judge that Marum had completed a court-ordered inpatient drug-and-alcohol treatment program and was under the facility's care at a sober-living home.
"He's also done very well in the domestic-violence programs," Grimes said, presenting the judge with a progress report from the Women's Resource Center.

The report said Marum completed 12 sessions and had 40 more to attend. He scored high in all eight categories, including acceptance of responsibility, empathy and insight.

"How many days sober?" Finlay asked Marum.

"A hundred and thirty, your Honor," he said.

"Pretty good. Excellent. And he's doing very well. He's completed 12 sessions," the judge said. "Do the people object to this modification?"

Deputy city attorney Stephen Marquardt did, though not vigorously.

"Your Honor, the people would like to state their reservations – based on the fact that there were three different incidents involving the defendant and the victim," Marquardt said, before summarizing each case:

September 2004 at Anthony's Fish Grotto in San Diego, where Sinkule worked. Marum "tried to drag her out of the business – her co-workers had to beat him off," Marquardt said. Marum jumped into San Diego Bay to elude police.

October 2004 in Linda Vista. Marum was caught vandalizing Sinkule's apartment.

December 2004, also in Linda Vista. Marum smashed a window from outside the apartment. He also was arrested for being under the influence of methamphetamine and possessing methamphetamine.

Marum pleaded guilty to vandalism and felony possession of meth. He was sentenced to three years' probation in March.

At that time, Marum was on probation for the earlier domestic-violence charges, which led to the protective orders. Marum's probation was revoked, but court records show he was sentenced to more treatment, not jail.

Before the June hearing, Sinkule met with prosecutors and victim advocates, and reviewed safety plans with them, Marquardt said.

"We clearly have reservations about the defendant. We don't necessarily have reservations about the victim. And, for that reason, we are willing to submit to the court on this matter," Marquardt said.

Judge Finlay retired in 2000, but she continues to work on the San Diego Superior Court bench. She declined to comment for this story.

That morning, Finlay asked Sinkule how she felt about losing her court protection.

"I'm looking at a series of events where you have been victimized by this defendant. . . . I have great reservations. . . . I want to protect you. I don't want this to happen to you anymore."

"Drugs greatly influenced a lot of the actions that happened," Sinkule said. "Um. We've worked through a lot of stuff. We've reflected on it, and learned what we can and cannot do. Um. Friends that we had we don't have in our life anymore. We're just trying to move forward now."

"How long have you known him?" Finlay asked.

"Eleven months," Sinkule replied.

"So, you've known him 11 months, and in three of those months you've been victimized?" the judge said.

"Yeah," Sinkule said, the word limping out of her mouth.

"Well, if this is what you want, I'll grant the motion. I also have great reservations because I'm seeing a pattern of behavior," the judge said, turning her attention to Marum.

"I hope you prove Mr. Marquardt and me wrong, and that our reservations are not based on anything more than just concern for Ms. Sinkule. But I'm concerned here. I think you're on pretty shaky ground."

At the end of the 10-minute hearing the judge said: "Good luck. I hope you make it."

It was time to leave

Sinkule drank socially, but she wasn't a drug user. She met the man she called Nate in a bar, her parents said. For a long time, she thought if he could kick his drug habit, he'd stop abusing her. She always saw the good in people, they said, but Marum had an unusual influence over her.
"He seduced her mind," her father, Glenn Sinkule, said.

Glenn and Claudia Sinkule moved to Carlsbad in September, about a month before their daughter was killed. The Sinkules, who lived in Palm Springs for 23 years, wanted to be closer to their daughters, who were in Oceanside.

Nicole Sinkule lived in a pale pink bungalow-style apartment four blocks from the beach. A small ceramic jack-o'-lantern still hangs above her front porch.

On the last day of her life, Sinkule was with her family in their Carlsbad home. They drank beer and ate quesadillas. Everyone signed the cast on Sinkule's left foot, which she broke while riding her bike on her birthday, Sept. 20.

Pictures were taken. Sinkule was smiling. Her toes, painted pumpkin orange, poked out of her cast.

But Sinkule's parents said the mood shifted when Marum showed up, acting gruff and withdrawn, to pick up his girlfriend and take her home.

After some tense moments, Mrs. Sinkule told him: "You need to get some help." Marum left alone.

Mrs. Sinkule drove her daughter back to Oceanside about 11:30 p.m. She said she thought about a "Dr. Phil" episode on TV about domestic abuse that the two of them watched the day before. It was called "Kick Him to the Curb."

She told Nicole it was time to leave Nate. Before she left, she gathered up the few shirts and things that belonged to Marum and left them on the curb in a garbage bag.

"She was going to do it. She was going to leave him. I think he knew it," Claudia Sinkule said, trying not to cry. "She wanted out."

Mrs. Sinkule said she kissed her daughter goodbye and left her shortly before 1 a.m. An hour later, she called 911 after a neighbor of her daughter's phoned to tell her Marum was at the apartment. After her second 911 call, Oceanside Police sent a squad car to the apartment. Police questioned the couple and left.

Shortly before 5 a.m., police were back at the apartment and Nicole Sinkule was dead. Within minutes, police broadcast a description of Marum and his vehicle. They found him driving about a half-mile from the apartment.

At 7 a.m., Mrs. Sinkule called her daughter. No one answered. She tried two more times. At 11:30 a.m., a detective with the Oceanside Police Department rang her doorbell.

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